Those of you following my publishing career know how desperate I am to make #1 on any Amazon.com list, even going so far as to challenge Tucker Max to a fistfight. Until this point, and despite my best efforts, I have failed at this endeavor. My Custom Van, while brilliant, never got above #2 in the humor category on Amazon.com. But now I can say without reservation that I am number 1! Where? On the prestigious Amazon.com Children's Books>Basic Concepts>Size & Shape>Fiction category. Yes, you have to reach down four sub-categories before I make the top of the list, but #1 is still #1, baby, and my new book Chicken Cheeks is unequivocally #1! Here's proof:
Never mind that the book is ranked 4,226 overall. That part doesn't matter. What matters is that I am #1 on a list, any list! I'd like to know what book is #1 in the Children's Books>Basic Concepts>Size & Shape>Non-Fiction category. Possibly the new David McCullough. Regardless, this feels like a real victory. I'm #1, fuckers.