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January 28, 2009

Random Stuff

If you have any interest in seeing me perform live this weekend, get your ass on a plane and come to Caroline’s Comedy Club in New York. Here’s what I can promise: I will be there, I will be telling jokes, alcoholic drinks will be served, at some point during the weekend I will give an audience member cash money, and I will introduce a brand new joke about the country of Ghana. Furthermore, I can pretty much guarantee that I will be the only comedian in America making a joke about Ghana this weekend. So if your taste in comedy runs towards jokes about small West African nations, this is the show for you.

For those of you wondering how The State reunion went in San Francisco last weekend, I can pretty much sum it up in two words: good. I realize that “good” is only one word, but that’s because I was playing a mental game of “Name That Tune” with myself while typing that last sentence, and so I decided to see if I could do myself one better than the aforementioned “two word” summation. Turns out I could.

It was great getting together with The State for a weekend of eleven-way-restaurant-check-splitting, awkward group photos, and dick jokes. We did two performances of our new hour of comedy, concluding each performance with an acoustic encore of “Porcupine Racetrack.” The audiences were very kind – not so much because of their abundant laughter, but because before the show they helped an old lady across the street. 

Janeane Garofalo did a fantastic job moderating a discussion between the eleven of us the day after our shows. We talked about all manner of things State, including our break-up and Kevin’s fire engine red pubic bush. That night, Stella hosted a night of comedy featuring State member Thomas Lennon, Eugene Merman, Tig Notaro, Seth Herzog, Nick Kroll, and Janeane, plus a special appearance by Michael Showalter’s musical duo, The Doilies. There was also a midnight screening of “Wet Hot American Summer,” with many cast members on hand to field random catcalls and incoherent drunk slurrings. Which is always a pleasure when you are jet lagged and wanting nothing more than to curl up in bed with a warm Ambien.

Now I’m home in Connecticut working with Michael Showalter on the project that I blogged about before but which I was then told not to mention again because it hasn’t been made public yet, but which has its own myspace page, and which may or may not be on a prominent comedy network sometime this summer.

And I read this somewhat awful thing about myself on the web. If you don’t want to bother reading it, a guy describes a girl reading a book on the subway; the basic gist is that he would have considered her to be attractive were it not for the fact that she was reading my book. My only consolation is that I think I am the only person who read this guy’s blog. If that besmirched girl is out there, please contact me. I want to assure you that you're beautiful not in spite of your literary choices, but because of them.



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Gena

Man, fuck that guy. I proudly read your book on the subway. I've also listened to your album, and the "Gay...question mark?" bit never fails to make me laugh out loud. Which probably makes me look insane, but keeps people from trying to talk to me, so it's a win-win.

Susanna

There were quite a few undesirables in that WHAS screening. It's probably a good thing you guys didn't stay for the entire movie.

And, hey, I openly carried Chicken Cheeks around San Francisco. Of course, most people there are focused on looking at drag queens.

Friend

Thank you so much for coming to San Francisco,and on behalf of the entire city, despite what they all actually think... this is town really loves you.
(Sorry for the drunkies, the rest of us whole heartedly appreciate you guys)

haha

Fall Out Boy is among the four or five bands he lists under "music" on his blog page. I wouldn't worry about it.

Amanda

You left that comment on his blog, didn't you?

Lo

It's Eugene Mirman, you goose.

Amanda

That's so funny. The other Amanda just basically said what I was going to ask.

Even if it wasn't you, it's still awesome. Haha.

I read your book in one day on my way down on a train to Boston. Almost the same setting. Only I don't sound as attractive as that girl. At least we have the same taste in humor: awesome.

Darren

I'd rather read satirical erotic fiction any day than a blog inspired by Craigslist's Missed Connections.

Stop Googling yourself or you'll keep finding this smut!

Meagan

First of all, this guy's writing is awful, and inspires much eye-rolling regardless of the book mentioned. Secondly, your book was easily my favourite read of the year, and I carry it around with me on all public transportation vehicles, hoping that someone will notice.

It's a shame that there were so many drunktards at the WHAS screening, but if it's any consolation, it was still a complete thrill for people like me, sitting mutely and soberly alone in the corner. All your performances this weekend were fantastic, and you were very generous and sweet when meeting your many adoring fans. Thank you.

Come to Toronto! It's fun, and people love you here.

Jesse

You should start marketing your books as deflector shields because it obviously saved that girl from having to speak with a weirdie.

Seriously? Who admits to liking FOB besides tween girlies trying to get up in there.

Camille

I would love to fly out to your show but I'm afraid my husband would think it's weird and I don't want to rock that boat!

That guy sure likes to pick-pick-pick, doesn't he? I bet he has major mother issues. I proudly read your book on the trolley and was so immersed that I missed my stop(soup kitchen).

BIT O HONEY

Am I reading this correctly, is Michael* sending us all tickets to fly to New York? Oh well if he's not, how bout we gas up my Grateful Dead VW bus thats rusting in my backyard and clunk on down? I'm dying to hear the West African joke. Power to my peeps!


We'll cruise around coffee shops and hotels looking for any sightings of Michael* during the day. At night we'll go to ALL to his shows and loiter till security throws us out. Think of it as a "Where's Waldo" game, only with Michael* as our target/victim/goal/reward.

* = Michael Douglas, my idol.

Ginger

*=Michael Bolton

Nickel Jean

DID you leave that comment? It does sound like something you would write, but the incorrect use of a semicolon tells me otherwise.

Reptar

How did you come across that blog in the first place? Did you Google "shitty blogs"?

If so, I'm disappointed you didn't stop by mine first.

The Descriptionist

MIB, you are right. You were the only person who read my blog.

However, you are wrong about me not liking her because of your book. The point I was attempting to make (albeit obviously poorly), was that the book did not fit with her clothing, it was that the book threw off my perceived idea of her. I was neither praising her nor bashing her for reading your book.

Thanks for reading the blog. I'll try to seek out more of your fans next time on the subway. At least you know that fan was a good dresser and cute.

Bailey

I really wish I could have been there!

I thought Ambien was like a pill, but maybe I just don't pay enough attention to tv commercials. I didn't know pills could be warm, unless you put them in the microwave or oven for a few minutes but who would do that? Now I need to go look up what Ambien is.

poop

the descriptionist is my iiiidooooollll!!!1!
i want to grow up and write a pretentious blog one day too!


also- did you notice that now on the side of the descriptionists blog it says "celebrities who've read this blog and told people" and under that heading is just "michael ian black".
L.O.L.'z!

Michelle

When is "Young Americans" supposed to come out?

Ryalye

Ghana reminds me of gonorrhea, which I'm sure the folks of Ghana have as well as AIDS...I'm glad I can't get shot through the internet.

As for The Descriptionist, he/she judges books by their cover. I do too, because reading and getting to know a person is really time consuming.

Camille

Life imitates art! You were great in that "Girl Drink Drunk" skit! (okay,sorry...couldn't resist)
I bet it's adorable when you're all tipsy but I'd also wager that if it persists,Sho is gonna get tired of watching you trip over his cats and sitting on the scanner/printer/copier.
Cheers!

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