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July 30, 2008

Blogging/ My Super Bike

If you’re wondering why I haven’t been blogging the past couple days it’s because I’ve been very busy working on my new television show with Michael Showalter. What is it? It’s basically a show where Michael and I do sketches and argue with each other. Would you like to come and see us tape it? You can. How? Information will be posted here very shortly.

Also, as many of you know, I race dirt bikes on the weekend. This weekend was a big race in Big Sur, California, so I had to fly out there with my super bike. I ride a 350cc Kawasaki custom Megafuck 3000. A lot of people have never heard of the Megafuck line of motorcycles, mainly because no television station or magazine will allow Kawasaki to advertise this product due to its name and because the handlebars are shaped like big erect dicks. It’s a very popular bike on the dirt bike racing circuit though because of its great design, excellent handling, and superb reliability. Why they chose to outfit such a fine motorcycle with potentially offensive dick-shaped handlebars and a muffler that belches viscous white fluid that looks like jizz is beyond me. And then on top of everything, to call it “Megafuck?” This seems like a terrible marketing decision on somebody’s part. What’s odd about all of this is that the Japanese are usually so conservative, and yet this sexually explicit motorcycle somehow survived Kawasaki’s corporate infrastructure to become the best/ most offensive motorcycle I have ever owned.

How did I do in the race? I lost.

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Selena

It's a shame you lost. With a bike like that?
I'd probably take it out back and...nevermind.

I had a dream I met you the other night. It felt very real. We talked about hotel soap.

Mitch

2nd!

the drunken blogger

question, why does the stella dvd say season one when its obvious there wasn't a second season? not knocking the show, i thought it was excellent, although i wonder who sows seeds on hardwood floors...

do i smell a second season brewing...

Travis

I hope the taping is in New York because I would love to go!

Camille

I'm guessing one must live in the NY or LA area to see a taping. Am I right? What do I win???

Susanna

I'm going to need the following information ASAP:

1. Where can I get a bike like that?
2. When do you start taping the shows?

P.S. I'd most likely ride this bike to your taping.

Therese

"Would you like to come us tape it?"

You might want to slip an "and see" in there.

I'd love to, thanks for asking. Oh wait, I live on the wrong continent!

As someone whose brother-in-law does dirtbiking, I'm gonna have to get inseider knowledge on that bike...

DreDay

This guy just torn up your post about that Wall E movie. I think you should lay some justice upon this poor soul. MIB4life!!

Therese

...and learn how to spell "insider", Jeez.

steg luh steg

i'm excited about your show

Bella

So is this like Gay Motocross that you're competing in?

And have you been to Japan? Conservative? I guess you haven't seen the Love Hotels, the pervy old men looking at cartoon underage porn, and the slobberingly wasted businessmen criss-crossing their way home at night. But yeah, they're kind of repressed. Which leads to the above interesting behavior.

kristina

That so-called information is coveted and you know it! Damn, MIB, what a tease.

sarah

Ok that's a good reason for not blogging. I am frreakiiiiing! michael and michael = heaven. Has the show been picked up? or are you guys doing the pilot? Shet we need more info about your show!!

Nickie

Gotta love a bike with dick-shaped handlebars. It might actually get me to ride a bike again.

Emma

Hmm. I too had a dream about you only mine involved scrabble and Little Ceasars.

The dirt bike sounds like it's straight out of Kawasucky Girls #5.

Ryalye

You lost the race and I lost my bet, and my home. Thanks.

Jenny

wow to several things!

first: new show. getting reeeeally excited about it.

secondly: want to attend. but what if i'm broke? does this include free flight and lobster dinners at exclusive (or scary) hotels? awesome.

thirdly: dick bike. neat. :D

Jaime

I'm not so concerned that the muffler is belching jizz, but just that it is belching any color viscous _fluid_ is a bit disturbing, for a muffler. That's just me.

Also, you are good squishee. Glad to hear from you, even though you taunt me with free far away tickets. Damn you coasts, east and west. The gulf has feelings too you know!

shro

hell yeah you lost. what did you expect with a megafuck bike?

Vance and Hines Exhaust

Could it be great if you post any pics from you riding your racing bike... can we see your bike? Also, even you lost the good thing there is you enjoy.

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I guess now you are not happy after you read the lyrics :P

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