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June 25, 2008

On Galleycat Today

Getting to the Bottom of the Black/Sedaris Feud

michael ian black head.jpg
When Michael Ian Black, author of My Custom Van, announced his feud with David Sedaris, I wanted to get to the bottom of things and asked him for the reasons behind it. Here's what he had to say:

David Sedaris has spent the last decade gaming the best-seller lists, which doesn't seem fair. There are literally NO OTHER memoirists out there who have cracked the best-seller lists because David Sedaris is hogging every single spot. (Augusten Burroughs, James Frey, Chelsea Handler, and all other best-selling memoirists excluded). I see myself as the Rocco Mediate to his Tiger Woods. I am standing up for all of the journeyman literary humorist/essayists out there just trying to claw our way onto the leader board alongside Mr. Sedaris. And to think that he's doing all of this from FRANCE??? It's mind-boggling. Where does he get off writing about stuff while living in France? That's soooo early-to-mid 20th century. Why does he get to live the glamorous life of an ex-pat while the rest of us are in the greatest country in the world, the United States of America, just struggling to pay the bills? Why does he get to eat unflavored yogurt and crepes loaded with Nutella and bananas while real Americans are choking down Chicken McNuggets and microwave popcorn? It's wrong. It's un-American and it's wrong. I'll even take it a step further: it's not just un-American. It's anti-American. He's happy to take American dollars from over here and spend them in cute French patisseries; in a sense, he is using the greatest currency in the world, the United States of America dollar, to subsidize a country that didn't even want to invade Iraq! And he seems completely unapologetic about that fact. You asked why I am doing this? I can give you the answer to that question with one word: The United States of America.

I've reached out to Sedaris' publicist at Little, Brown but have yet to receive an official response. Meanwhile, Black just announced a contest on his blog to Transform Sedaris into a super-villian.


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I posted a team Michael on my podcast blog but I don't know where the post went. Maybe Sedaris hacked in and stoled it. Bastard!


Michael, you are missing a fantastic merchandising opportunity here. Why isn't your online store open yet?? Think of the t-shirts, mugs and thongs you could sell with such slogans as:

Michael Ian Black: Way funnier and more American than David Sedaris.

The United States of Michael Ian Black

Michael Ian Black (very famous celebrity, best-selling humorist)


How about for a t-shirt.. Michael Ian Black does not live in France.


That's a beguiling (if slightly effeminate) pose you're striking in that accompanying picture.

I know Jack Shit about David Spedaris, so I made up some stuff for the Super-villain contest.


Sedaris is another example of how NPR is killing America. Game shows? Heck yeah. Keillor? Of course! "And now, the comments of.." or "this I believe"?!? Gimme'a break. News...or even worse...weekend news? Always lame.


You wear(and rock)that v-neck while that v-neck would wear Sedaris.


Fabulous! You actually LOOK like you live in Connecticut now - all sparkly clean - living right.

Why, you almost look...Christian!



Sedaris' new book is lackluster. Between the mind-blowingly awesome title of your book, and your plug from Amy Sedaris, I think you automatically win this battle. Those two things alone are worth, like, infinity points.


"Unfortunately, has to live in Houston."

Ha ha ha. Who knew that VH1 show was already airing? Or that MIB was on it again? Not me, until about 20 minutes ago. Just in time to catch the funniest line ever.


Amazon is against you! If you look at your book's listing, in the section where the show other products they have a DAVID SPEDARIS novel!

I guess Amazon.com is just a bunch of Spedophilles now...


Well, say what you want about David Sedaris, Amy Sedaris is still cool. She is my hero.

au naturel

Hi Michael. I notice you're skipping Portland* on your book tour-- but you'll be close by, in Seattle and San Fran. Why not stop by here and come to Powell's**, where Spedaris' books practically have a room of their own?

*coolest place ever
**most magnificent bookstore in the world

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