"Run, Fatboy, Run" Premiere Tonight
The big movie premiere is tonight. What a difference from my last movie, "The Pleasure of Your Company," which MGM bought and subsequently fucked up every which way they could (changed the title to the worst title in movie history and broke their contract and lied to my face because they are fucking liars). Picturehouse, the people who are releasing "Fatboy," have done a fantastic job putting this event together and getting the movie into the wide, wide world. I'm not sure how many screens it's going be on, but I think I heard something like 35,000,000, which is a lot, especially when you consider that "Lord of the Rings" opened on 4,000 screens. So that's a big difference. The big question, of course: what am I wearing? I've been agonizing over this decision, and brought five steamer trunks to Los Angeles so I could delay my choice as long as possible. Obviously everybody is expecting me to wear my normal tux/swimming flippers combination, but I've done that to death at all the awards shows, etc, so I think I might try something different. Maybe capri pants, halter top, and "rasta" wig. Maybe ankle monitoring devices and spiderweb tattoo. Many, many questions. As far as the weather goes, lovely day for a film premiere. Sunny skies and temperate temps. The perfect day to sit in a dark room. Everybody is asking: where's the after-party? In my previous post, I mentioned that we are doing it at Dos Burritos, one of the higher end fast food burrito chains in Los Angeles. That was a lie. But I can't say where it is, not only because it's at a VERY EXCLUSIVE HOLLYWOOD NIGHTCLUB, but because I wasn't invited and so I don't know where it is. That's also a lie. It's at someplace called Les Deux, which I am told from my wife's aunt in North Dakota is the "IT" place. How my wife's aunt in North Dakota knows this, I am not sure, but if she knows about it, then I am confident it's going to be amazing. If you've never been to a movie premiere, it's a lot like going to the movies, only the popcorn is free and the director usually gives a speech beforehand, where he thanks everybody. Then, the after-party is where everybody congratulates each other, and instead of free popcorn, it's free drinks and sometimes delicious canapes. Regular readers to this blog know how much I ADORE canapes. Anyway, it should be a fun evening.