Bore-Lando, Florida
I know that topic heading is provocative. Is Orlando really that boring? No, not at all. Which is why I should never have used the term "Bore-Lando." That's wrong, and if any Floridians are reading this post, I apologize. It should really be called "Snorlando," because it's such a fucking snore.
Again, that was wrong of me to say, and again, I apologize. I saw a cheap joke there and I decided to go ahead and make it; I'm sorry. Orlando is a great town, although being in Florida obviously reminds me of the 2000 Presidential election, which was lost by Al Gorlando. Perhaps if he had won, we wouldn't currently be engaged with Iraq in a Warlando.
One nice thing about Florida, though, is getting a tan at the seashorlando.
So yeah, it's great to be here. At the moment it's about half an hour before showtime. I'm not going to make any more Orlando rhymes, and I'm sorry if I offended any Floridians, because it really is a wonderful city, filled with so many cheap women that they really should call it Whorlando.
That was uncalled for.
See, it's just that after the warm reception we gave you and Sho in Atlanta, everything else pales in comparison.
And that's why you two need to come to the South more often. Yea and verily.
Posted by: Ethereal Zoe | October 26, 2007 at 07:40 PM
Your wordplay puts a smile on my face. Don't forget about the whores in KS!(really, that twaddle I laid on you was purely platonic)
Posted by: Camille | October 26, 2007 at 08:33 PM
Tee hee hee. That was fun. Ok, ok. If you insist. I'll try it too.
If you choose to pick a Whorlando in the shabby section of Poorlando, you'll get an oozing Sorelando on your...wiener.
Hmm.
Posted by: Reen | October 26, 2007 at 10:23 PM
Teehee,Renee...I'd just bypass Whorlando and head straight to Oral-ando.
Posted by: Camille | October 26, 2007 at 10:28 PM
Sounds like you're having a hoot of a time in Florlando.
Posted by: Susanna | October 27, 2007 at 12:36 AM
I hope the show wasn't too much of a chore-lando.
Posted by: Therese | October 27, 2007 at 07:49 AM
to be truthful, I lived there for the past almost a decade and I can honestly tell you that amongst certain circles (mine included) it is called Whorelando. You just forgot the e.
now...about your wiener...
Posted by: luvychic | October 27, 2007 at 12:52 PM
hahaha. There's a lot of Death Metal bands that sing about animal rape. And fun things for the kids, too.
Posted by: Jason | October 27, 2007 at 04:16 PM
You were great in BORE-LANDO! Sorry about the fucking assholes, they were right behind me...EEK! :-(
Posted by: Ash | October 28, 2007 at 04:11 PM
after the misfortune of having to spend more than just a few hours in that rancid little place, feel free to let loose on it. your true fans should just get the hell out of there
Posted by: tomdog | October 28, 2007 at 11:31 PM